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Perception and necessity of pain

Updated: Feb 18, 2020

I had a conversation with my wonderful sister Piara about a picture she found on the internet on the other day. We, two, had different impressions about it and it triggered my interest if may the picture call out something personal from our unconscious. I ran a pilot test just like a kind of Rorschard-test. I have to add that I am not an expert in Rorschard-test analysis either, but I was very interested in the results.

Our theory was that the interpretation of the picture depends on the individual personal-development/background experiences etc.

I believe that the picture has a hidden (in-built) trigger to provoke the 'core wound' or so called 'separation wound'.

Our hypothesis, that the interpretation can go more than 2 different ways were supported straight away by the first three responses.

I was amazed by the interest the post received in couple of hours. The honesty and openness went beyond all my expectations.

The picture we are speaking about is the second picture attached to this post. It is a woman facing a man, hugging him while he putting or pulling feather out or to her back.

My first impression was cruelty came from the 'dangerous looked' sting under the woman's skin and there were others confirming my feelings towards it and expressed that the way the man putting the feather under the woman skin is a painful procedure. There were others who still expressed the feeling of pain and hurt but the direction was the opposite and they claimed that the feather was pulling out and not putting in. In that way it can be seen that the man removing the 'angel-kind' from the woman and it caused pain.

There were others who claimed that the picture has a clear meaning to backstabbing somebody, the man may be a cheater.

It was also claimed that the picture is an expression of Narcissistic and Empath relationship, or the expression of sadomasochism.

The summary of the 'painful impression' version expressed that either pulling or putting in, it is an impression of intruding to the other soul and make her be something she does not want to be.

But... there were others with different kinds of view...

There were the ones claiming that it is the expression of pure love where the man helps the woman finding her way back to Heaven, and again here the feather represent the angel-kind.

It was also claimed that the picture express that love gives wings, where feather representing freedom and flying.

There was an other claim that in the picture the man holding the woman who is dying and he does not want to let her go, he does not want her to die and he is fighting for her. Here the feather represents death or end of existence.

And there was a complex view - which I like very much - if the picture expresses the self-improvement to accept our feminine and masculine side and try to make it whole again, while this transformation and self-development demands efforts and sacrifices which can be hurtful. In that meaning feather represents the Divinity.


Seeing the different kind of views it can be seen that the symbol of a simple feather can speak about the world of the person and their way of thinking and how they finding their way in Life. It can express - fear about death, fear about left alone, fear about backstab, fear about getting hurt, fear about rejection, fear about losing yourself in a relationship. Or in the 'positive' side - feather can represent the desired goal, the wish for Divine Unity, the utmost feeling of love -with freedom inside or the uniqueness and angel-kind of personality as a desired aim, or get back to 'Heaven' - in a meaning of a perfect and safe home.


Examining deeper that two opposite point of views - the main difference is the existing or the lack of 'pain'. What does it mean pain and is that necessary? Do we have to make sacrifice to reach a desired goal or is there an other way?

If we think about 'pain' as a feeling, the same way as love or sadness, experiencing it gives the opportunity to let it feel and let it go. This way of thinking required to be in the observer seat out of the feeling itself, with a clear intention not to grab or hold back the experience.

There is an other theory I remembered from the book I read from Coelho - Eleven minutes - the deeper examination of pain. In this meaning pain is a door for purification.

There are different viewpoint of this matter and I would like to stay in the middle line to let everybody decide for themselves. I believe that destiny or karma is something much more complex than to decide within a two-dimension scale. There are people who's life is very hard and full of struggle while others seems like playing with their cards all the way. There are different theories for example reincarnation-theories saying there are tasks we brought to us from our previous life to complete. And there are theories saying that reaching a desired goal need to be earned on a hard way otherwise it wont be respected.

The 'necessity of pain' is a very complex and deep theme and a lifetime is not enough to scratching the surface however every scratch will take you deeper to understand something mystical and sacred about the meaning of life.


Photo source: unknown




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