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Chop wood, Carry water

Updated: May 9, 2023

Zen masters knew that the simplest things in life are the essence of the most sacred ones. Just like an elderly shaman woman's teaching said: if your world seems to be in chaos and you need to heal, go back to the basics, and use your hands. Slow down and do the mundane things to let your spirit settle down and get clarity.


The magical things in cleaning if it is done properly it opens up energy blocks in both worlds simultaneously. I am speaking about cleaning up your own mess, not to demand someone else to clean your shit because it is the job for 'immigrants' or 'robots'.

How surprising it is that everything what is sacred in this world has a twisted layer, which divests the treasure from its true value.


I have a tendency to drop things if it did not work out as I imagined it. Obviously, the breaking point is high, so it means when I drop the thing, I really went through Hell for it. May be that is the reason why I drop it on the first place. You go down and see something you were not prepared, you see the truth, the reality what is breaking up your illusion and now you just do not want to see it, you do not want a reminder. They said PTSD works the same, it freezes down much bigger place in your memory than the original damage for safety reason. That means it freezes down the good things together with the bad ones.


But do not go so far, just slow down, step by step, first go back to the cleaning part.

So I have had a dream to open a shop. I found the shop, it was beautiful, perfect location in a mid of a fashion-centered city for a good price and I started negotiation for it. Everything went so well, we discussed the details, setting up plans, I bought all the inside trails, when all of a sudden, some unexpected intrusion happened, and the owner withdrew the offer. More than three months of vision, planning, hoping, organizing, investing is gone. So what I did as usual, dropped the things and did not even look at it anymore which was difficult because it blocked my view piling up in my living room.


It takes courage to go back to the scene of a trainwreck and start over and clean the mess. But step by step.

So I settled down for a deep cleaning and I decided to start with the place, which has been locked much earlier, it was locked since I came to Ireland. It was the wardrobe with all the Middle East skeletons in it.


And that is the reason why I came to the most rural area I could find at the first place, to heal, to listen to the inner voice, to slow down... and to write 'The Book' about 'The Mission'. I had no idea how long it would take to be able to open that closet and face that skeleton, not to mention to write about it.

How funny is it from life that the village people truly felt that I hiden something. But they made up their minds from their own perspectives and they thought that it would be something shameful, ugly, what is matching my so called 'dirty hands' they called it. They would never imagine that I have a Wonderful Narnia Lion - if we are in my closet after all - who stood up for Humanity, and my hands got 'dirty' by helping others for a cause I felt important enough to risk my life for it, and that Lion was hidden for their own safety.

And around that Lion were those wonderful dresses in my wardrobe, which all had a story of their own, telling tales about another life from another era, with beaty and rich, but also with cruelty and fakeness, with high standard and immaculate behavior but also lies and demands and there was me in the mid of it incapsulated into my dreamy world desperately seeking another vision to find an underground fountain in a desert, somewhere below the surface dreaming about a time where all of it would be nothing more just memories in a wardrobe. Memories and memories came and passed on me and I felt the time has come to integrate all of them back to me. After all that village-push was definitely needed to reach this point.

So The Book has been finally started to be written in very small steps recalling those memories in digestible doses.


Cleaning with hands, as the wise ones say, is also sorting and integrating things, giving a push to start blood circulation in the blocked area and sweeping the dust off from the real and making place for the new.


So lets see how is the pilled up mountain in the living room, may I jump on the top and clear up the energy block and restart something new over there as well.






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